So , it hit the nation big time. Sweeping all the main life sucking social media sites like I like a forest fire at the height of summer - its certain to say that this new odd looking Starbucks concoction is a talking point of the entire world.
Top bloggers were seen fighting over who could review it first, people were seen queuing for hours outside multiple city centre Starbucks locations, just to get their hands on one. The strange and uncomfortably intoxicating excitement expressed by most of the nation was like a new iphone was being released, back when people actually gave a shit. Justin Bieber apparently thew one over a fan in L.A.. But the question we all want to know is, is it vegan ?!..
We're very sad to tell you that it isn't.... (It's filled with milk and topped with cream, of course it isn't vegan!) But.. equally... we're also delighted to tell you that it can be.
All you have to do is tell the geeky, but strangely attractive, barista behind the counter, "I want one of those magical colourful heavenly cups of unicorn joy, but make it dairy free, vegan and leave out the weird blue squiggle and, Go Vegan Mother Fuckers!" .. *pump your fist into the air, Ali-shuffle your feet & scream like deranged football fan*
Ok, perhaps the last 4 words, and the actions that followed are not absolutely essential, but pretty important nevertheless. Or you could just unconfidently mumble, "Soy Unicorn Frap, No whip please or blue stuff please" like I did.
(The blue stuff has milk powder in it, just ask them to squirt some other weird coloured vegan friendly syrup in its place)
So get ready to be a part of magical unicorn history. Buy one, post it on Instagram - everyone will call you a massive pussy, and then they'll go out an buy one too.
Please note, no unicorns were harmed in the making of this blog.
Share this post immediately, to make a clear, profound & conflicting statement that you cant stand any of this colourful bullshit.